Passing the Panty

I know it’s taken me a while to write a new blog post, but in my defense I lost the draft of this that was super awesome and included youtube links and everything. I had to do ten whole minutes of research in finding those links to copy and paste.  I could have jerked off to a video of Dominic Cooper in the time it took me to write that.  But since I think passing panties outside of the context of Japanese vending machines is important, I’ll suck it up and do this again for you all.

Passing the panty refers to the act of a jammer taking off her star panty and giving it to the pivot, thus making the pivot the jammer.  To those of you familiar with this, it’s old news. To those of you who are not, it probably sounds really weird. But get ready because it’s becoming more and more popular.  As an example, I found a youtube video that includes a panty pass. For some reason when I wrote the first, long lost draft of this, I found a panty pass from the Rose City Rollers after about ten minutes of watching a bout.  I cannot find it to save my life, so here’s a link to a bout between the Amsterdam Derby Dames and the Roller Girls of the Apocalypse.  The panty pass is initiated by the Roller Girls of the Apocalypse, which is the green/grey team, at about 50 minutes in.  Milf Shakes, the girl being held back by the black team, takes off her panty while the camera is focused on the Amsterdam chick in the obnoxious skirt.  When the camera comes back around you can see her get close enough to the pivot to pass it, thus completing the star pass.

I hope you actually watched that because GOD DAMN that took forever to find.  I might make a slower youtube tutorial on panty passes and include live action examples of ‘do this not that because that shit’s totes illegal’, but that would require use of the warehouse where we practice in between hockey guys, so we’ll see.  For now a discussion with a few youtube examples will have to suffice.

Some of you may be reading this and wondering what the point of a panty pass is.  Basically it just means people are tired.  If a wall is doing a fantastic job holding back a jammer who maaaaybe skipped too many morning jogs, she gets winded and is basically useless.  It’s kind of like how your legs stop wanting to cooperate during your 27 in 5. Being a jammer is an incredibly intense physical experience and requires and lot of off skates work to be good at due to the physicality of it.  So if you can’t handle the physicality of it and it’s affecting your ability to get through a wall, pass that shit.

Now that you know what a star pass is, or already knew and are irritated with me on how much time I spent explaining it, here are things to know about the panty pass:

-The panty must be passed by hand from the jammer to the pivot upright and in bounds in the engagement zone.  This means you can’t throw it, or use other blockers to help pass it, or skate to the other side of the track to do it.

-Once the pivot becomes a jammer the jammer cannot take the panty back.  By completing the pass the jammer becomes another blocker, and non-pivot blockers cannot engage in a star pass.

-You can block the shit out of people while they’re trying to complete a star pass.  In that same bout I linked above you can see Amsterdam throwing a ‘fuck no’ at a star pass by Roller Girls of the Apocalypse at 53:20.  Take a look at how tired Knox YaOva looks.  That’s why you do a star pass.  She tried and got blocked out of bounds. At that point she put the star back on (which she can because she never completed the pass).

-When a jammer does not have her star panty on she is considered an inactive jammer and cannot score points or get lead jammer status.  When a jammer takes her star panty off she can no longer obtain lead jammer for the rest of the jam. However, when the panty is back on she can score points.

-The star panty can only be passed to the pivot.

-If the panty falls during the pass either the jammer or pivot can pick it up. No one else. However, if the pivot picks it up she must give it back to the jammer by handing it or throwing it, and the jammer must HAND it back to her in order to complete the pass.

-The panty doesn’t have to be visible during a pass.  You can stuff that shit in your bra and hide it if you want. If you’re going to be shenanigous in this way, though, do it carefully since you forfeit point scoring if the panty is in your bra and not on your brain saver.

-Don’t go out of bounds during the pass, even accidentally. That’s not a legal pass and you will get a penalty.

-Don’t try to complete the pass while one of the partied is being whistled for a penalty. If a jammer isn’t paying attention and is handing the panty off while getting whistled for a penalty, more penalties will be had.

-If the jammer takes her panty off and the pivot has not acquired the panty through a legal star pass, the jammer is the inactive jammer.  If it drops during the pass the and pivot picks it up, if it’s hanging out in the jammer’s bra, the jammer is the inactive jammer. The moment the pass is completed legally the pivot becomes the inactive jammer and the former jammer becomes a regular ole blocker.  A good example of this is, again, in that same bout I already linked at about 35:25.  The Roller Girls of the Apocalypse Jammer decides she’s had enough, makes a legal star pass and before the pivot is able to put it on she gets called for a penalty.  Then the other jammer gets a penalty pretty quickly after that and goes to the box.  The Roller Girls of the Apocalypse pivot, now inactive jammer, didn’t realize she was officially the jammer now, and argues with the penalty box folks about not being a jammer when they ask her to move to the jammer spot and then leave.  She was wrong and cost her team a few seconds out of the penalty box.  Get a good grasp on it now, because I promise you there will be a day where you use it and you don’t want to make such a simple mistake.

That about covers the star pass.  I’m sure there’s shit I’m missing but I have shit to do like a responsible adult, so I should get to that.  If there’s a point I’m missing and you think it needs to be included, feel free to leave a comment and I’ll add it in and throw out props.

Until next time,

Stein

35 minutes

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